Lone Star Slope Dopes

I skied (once in my entire life) in Texas ski wear and I didn't even know it (at the time). Suffice it to say that I made it halfway down the Loveland Basin Ski Run in 1963. The details are not worth rehashing, but I rode the chair lift back down to the bottom of the Run. And I was alone on that side of the chair lift. It was a Texas ski adventure before I ever got to Texas. If this is (fair & balanced) mortification, so be it.


[x Slate]
Fast, Burnt Orange, and Out of Control: Why I love Texas skiers
By Alex Heard

If you've ever skied in New Mexico—at Taos, Santa Fe, or a lesser-known resort like Sipapu or Red River—you may have noticed a bit of one-way friction. Texans come here every winter, by the thousands, on ski trips. They show up looking to have a good time, but the New Mexicans repay them by snickering and griping behind their backs. The bitch list contains these elements: They're loud; they're out of control; they get in the way; they wear jackets littered with logos (Longhorns, Aggies, Red Raiders) instead of proper ski attire; the women trowel on too much makeup and screech when they fall; the men dribble Skoal juice on the snow; they all drive SUVs; and they jack up the cost of living because they throw money around without discernment.

This conflict plays out elsewhere in the Rockies and is similar to the tourists-vs.-locals tension on display in any vacation spot. But things are worse in New Mexico, in part because Texas committed the long-lasting PR gaffes of invading the state during the Civil War (they lost that one) and again during the 1970s oil boom (they won, buying up adobe properties in Santa Fe that have since risen in value by roughly 1 billion percent).

I can see why those things would irritate, but New Mexicans' reflexive hatred of all things Lone Star blinds them to the fact that Texas skiers are a wonderful breed. New Mexicans should learn to love the go-for-it spirit of Texas skiers. And at the close of a Winter Olympics in which the much-anticipated U.S. Ski Team came off like a cross between Hamlet and Herman Munster, Americans as a whole should ask if the unabashed style of the Texas skier can be distilled, bottled, and administered illegally with a syringe.

I saw my first classic Texas skier 10 years ago at Angel Fire, a family-oriented resort in northeastern New Mexico that gets most of its clientele from across the border. I was on a long lift ride with three New Mexicans when a Texas skier—red-faced, fat, clad in jeans, a Longhorns jacket, and a seed cap—zoomed under us, hollering like Slim Pickens and not making any turns whatsoever as he picked up an alarming amount of speed.

"That clown shouldn't be doing that," somebody said in a superior tone.

Actually, that's exactly what he should have been doing. A guy like that probably skis once a year, tops. When that's your reality, you have two choices: You can take a lesson every year, eking out slow, dull little wedge turns under the tutelage of a bored instructor. Or you can drink a couple of beers, strap on your planks, and point 'em toward the parking lot.

And, yes, if you do it that way, you're going to crash hard and often. But how bad is a snow wipeout compared with playing high-school football in Midland or losing a bar fight in Dallas? This honorable mode of travel is known as the Texas Downhill, and Angel Fire (to its credit) celebrates it during an annual Big Ol' Texas Weekend that features a no-turns-allowed race.

I also defend Texans' much-derided ski-wear choices, which (while unsightly) make practical sense. Recently, in Santa Fe, I got stuck in a grocery-store line behind an affluent-looking pair of Spanish tourists who wanted to know where they could buy all-new ski clothing for their kids. For just one day of skiing.

No way a Texas family makes that mistake. When the ski trip approaches, they just raid the hunting closet. If there aren't enough camos, orange hats, and Carhartt overalls for everybody, they fill in the gaps with stuff from the gardening shed.

Needless to say, Texas skiers are a boon to the New Mexico economy. During a bad snow year like the one we're suffering through now, their presence keeps our ski areas open.

But I also love them for less mercantile reasons. In my experience, they are—without exception—very friendly people. I started skiing late in life (mid-30s), and I paid for it in the early going. When you're struggling to learn, there's nothing more important than the presence of sympathetic fellow stumblers. New Mexicans acted snooty. Texans shared my pain, and I had many deep, meaningful lift conversations that went like so:

Me: "How's it going?"
Texan: "Woooo. Man. I don't know."
Me: "I hear you, pardner."
Texan: "What I don't like is gettin' off the dang chair."
Me: "Me neither. But you hang in there."
Texan: "You too. And y'all have a GOOD day, awright?"

Just before Christmas, I "celebrated Texas skierness" by driving to Angel Fire and taking a lesson with a group of beginner Texans. They did not disappoint. There was a squealing mom with big hair and her husband's duck-hunting coat. There was a woman wearing enough makeup to terrify a Mary Kay rep. My favorite, though, was a high-school kid I'll call A.C., a huge, loud lunk who competes in calf-roping back home and basically ignored everything the ski instructor said.

"You pull that stuff up on the hill, you're going to get hurt," the instructor lectured.

"I don't give a shit," A.C. happily replied. Before long he was crashing rampantly and having a great time. We should all be so reckless.

Alex Heard is the editorial director of Outside magazine.

Copyright © 2006 Slate

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Dub Didn't Know Redux

Dub and the Bush families have financial ties to the Saudis (and probably their UAE neighbors). What's good for the House of Saud is good for the House of Bush. The kicker in all of this is that Dub was unaware of the port management deal with the UAE until well after the fact. How long, O Lord, will we be burdened with this dolt? Bring on that veto, Dub! Your first veto will be overturned by a massive congressional majority against this "deal" between the U.S. and the UAE. If this is more (fair & balanced) incompetence, so be it.

[x Village Voice]
Dubai's Port of No Return
by James Ridgeway

Don't jump to conclusions, but there are ties between the UAE, bin Laden, and the Taliban.

WASHINGTON, D.C.—No matter what Bush and his supporters say, there is indisputable evidence of tight connections between the United Arab Emirates and leadership of both the Taliban and Al Qaeda. The country is the center of financial activity in the Persian Gulf, and has next to no laws controlling money laundering.Two of the hijackers came from the UAE and hijacker money was laundered through the UAE. The details are spelled out in documents in the government's case against Moussaoui.

The ties with bin Laden and the Taliban reach far back into the '90s. Prominent Persian Gulf officials, including members of the UAE royal family, and businessmen would fly to Kandahar on UAE and private jets for hunting expeditions, the Los Angeles Times reported in 2001. In addition to ranking UAE ministers, these parties included Saudi big wigs like Prince Turki, the former Saudi intelligence minister who now is ambassador to the U.S.

General Wayne Downing, Bush's former national director for combating terrorism, was quoted on MSNBC in September, 2003 saying, "They would go out and see Osama, spend some time with him, talk with him, you know, live out in the tents, eat the simple food, engage in falconing, some other pursuits, ride horses. One noted visitor is Sheik Mohammed bin Rashid al Maktum, United Arab Emirates Defense Minister and Crown Prince for the emirate of Dubai.''

Bin Laden and Taliban leader Mullah Omar joined the hunting parties, and there are suspicions Al Qaeda and Taliban personnel are smuggled out on returning flights.

Here is one report, sourced to the 9-11 Commission, appearing in Paul Thompson's 9-11 timeline:

"February 1999: Bin Laden Missile Strike Called Off for Fear of Hitting Persian Gulf Royalty. Intelligence reports foresee the presence of bin Laden at a desert hunting camp in Afghanistan for about a week. Information on his presence appears reliable, so preparations are made to target his location with cruise missiles. However, intelligence also puts an official aircraft of the United Arab Emirates (UAE) and members of the royal family from that country in the same location. Bin Laden is hunting with the Emirati royals, as he did with leaders from the UAE and Saudi Arabia on other occasions (see 1995-2001). Policy makers are concerned that a strike might kill a prince or other senior officials, so the strike never happens. A top UAE official at the time denies that high-level officials are there, but evidence subsequently confirms their presence. (9-11 Commission Report, 3/24/04 (B))"

It remains a key center of operations for Victor Bout, the notorious arms dealer, with ties to Taliban and Al Qaeda. There were also ties to the infamous BCCI.

As the Financial Times put it, in the UAE, "Western fraud investigators may find a link here or a connection there, with a person suspected of breaking western laws. But in Dubai, and its neighbor Sharjah, trails tend to vanish like wind-blown tracks in desert sands . . . Secrecy keeps everyone guessing—and speculating . . . 'Medieval feudalism' is how one senior western banker described Dubai's style of government, 'with a veneer of 21st century regulations.'"

James Ridgeway is a prominent investigative journalist. He serves as Washington correspondent for The Village Voice, where he has worked since the mid-1970s. Ridgeway broke the story about GM hiring private investigators to gather damaging evidence about Ralph Nader after he wrote Unsafe at Any Speed. GM planned to blackmail Nader with this stuff (that never materialized) and ended up paying Nader a 6-figure settlement to avoid a slander suit. The equivalent of that 6-figure sum today would be in the millions of dollars.

Copyright © 2006 The Village Voice

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