Friday, June 09, 2017

Roll Over, InfoWars — The Borowitz Report Scooped ALL Other Media Outlets

In the aftermath of the gavel-to-gavel coverage of former FBI Director James Comey eappearing before the US Senate Intelligence Committee on June 8, 2017, the party line leaked by the White House (to portray Il Douche in the best light) reported no outbursts by the Son-of-the-Beach (Mar-a-Lago), either verbal or tweeted. However, that is "fake news." Handy Andy (Borowitz) provides a truthful account of the White House during the hearing. If this is (fair & balanced) real journalism, so be it.

[x New Yorker/The Borowitz Report, June 8, 2017]
White House On Lockdown After Television Is Hurled Out Window
By Andy Borowitz

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The White House was on lockdown Thursday morning after a television was hurled out of a window, the Secret Service reported.

The incident, which occurred shortly after 10 AM EST, caught the attention of the Secret Service after agents heard the sound of smashing glass emanating from the Oval Office.

“The sound was consistent with that of a large object, such as a television set, being thrown through a closed window,” a Secret Service spokesman said.

The television, which crashed to the ground outside the Oval Office, injured no one, the Secret Service confirmed.

A group of fourth-grade students from Bethesda, Maryland, was on a White House tour when the incident involving the television occurred.

“I heard someone screaming lots of swear words and then, like, this big crash,” Zach Dorrinson, a student on the tour, said. “It was messed up.” # # #

[Andy Borowitz is the creator the "Borowitz Report," a Web site that is a lot funnier than the stuff posted by Matt Drudge and his ilk. Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears regularly in The New Yorker. He is the first winner of the National Press Club's humor award and has won seven Dot-Comedy Awards for his web site. His most recent book (and Amazon's Best Kindle Single of the Year) is An Unexpected Twist (2012). Borowitz received a BA, magna cum laude (English) from Harvard University.]

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