Tuesday, November 05, 2019

Roll Over, Lauren Bacall — The LK (Lyin' King) Can't Whistle, But He Sure Does Blow

In "To Have And Have Not" (1944), Lauren Bacall (Marie “Slim” Browning) said to Humphrey Bogart (Harry “Steve” Morgan): “You don’t have to act with me, Steve. You don’t have to say anything and you don’t have to do anything. Not a thing. Oh, maybe just whistle.” Then: “You know how to whistle, don’t you Steve? You just put your lips together, and blow.” This blogger was a wee lad and "To Have And Have Not" was the earliest film he ever saw in a darkened theater. Today we have whistleblowers in the news and The LK (Lyin' King" blowing hot and hard threats against anyone with puckered lips. If this is (fair & balanced) proof of The LK's personality disintegration, so be it.

[x The New Yorker]
Trump Accuses Whistle-Blower Of Working For United States
By Andrew *(Andy) Borowitz


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Escalating his war of words against the person who sparked the impeachment inquiry, Donald J. Trump on Monday accused the whistle-blower of working for the United States of America.

Speaking to reporters at the White House, Trump said that he had evidence “directly linking” the whistle-blower to the United States government.

“This is the biggest witch hunt in the history of witches or hunts, and it was all started by someone who was in the pay of the United States,” Trump said. “It’s a disgrace.”

Expanding his attack, Trump accused his principal congressional nemeses, Representative Adam Schiff and Representative Nancy Pelosi, of being “card-carrying employees of the United States.”

“Follow the money,” he said. “Shifty Adam Schiff is cashing United States government checks every single week.”

Trump said that he was confident that his supporters would “see the impeachment inquiry for what it is: a conspiracy by people working on behalf of a country.”

“What it comes down to is, who are you going to trust, somebody who is working for the United States, or me?” he asked. ###

[Andrew (Andy) Borowitz is the creator the Borowitz Report, a Web site that is a lot funnier than the stuff posted by Matt Drudge and his ilk. Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears regularly in The New Yorker. He is the first winner of the National Press Club's humor award and has won seven Dot-Comedy Awards for his web site. His most recent book (and Amazon's Best Kindle Single of the Year) is An Unexpected Twist (2012). Borowitz received a BA, magna cum laude (English) from Harvard University (MA).]

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