Friday, February 22, 2013

Today, An Ode To Dehydration

The junior Senator from the Sunshine State (Marco Rubio R-FL) had to snatch up a bottle of water in the midst of his predictable response to the SOTU 2013. But did the water come from Rubio's home state? Oh no! The dehydrated solon grabbed up a bottle of Poland Spring — produced in Maine! There are 45 spring water bottling companies in Florida, but the Dumbo went for a Maine-product. Of course, the brouhaha over the bottled thirst-quencher is appropriate: the Dumbo junior senator from Florida is all wet! Today, this blog's poet-in residence — Calvin Trillin — proclaims that Rubio is the Senator from Poland Spring! If this is (fair & balanced) disdain, so be it.

[x The Nation]
The Sip Heard Round The World
By Calvin Trillin

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He sought to trash the Democrats.
He’d rough them up for sure, but first he
Just had to have a bit to drink.
Poor Rubio was dry and thirsty.

Though pundits say his future’s bright,
Whatever life to him may bring,
His sobriquet will always be
The senator from Poland Spring. Ω

[Calvin Trillin began his career as a writer for Time magazine. Since July 2, 1990, as a columnist at The Nation, Trillin has written his weekly "Deadline Poet" column: humorous poems about current events. Trillin has written considerably more pieces for The Nation than any other single person. A native of Kansas City, MO, Trillin received his BA from Yale College in 1957. He served in the army, and then joined Time.]

Copyright © 2013 The Nation

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Sapper's (Fair & Balanced) Rants & Raves by Neil Sapper is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. Based on a work at Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available here.

Copyright © 2013 Sapper's (Fair & Balanced) Rants & Raves