Wednesday, August 03, 2016

Say Goodbye To The GOP & Greet Its Replacement — The Stupid Party & Its Followers, The Stupids

The news media mantra was formerly "If it bleeds, it leads." In the Age of Donald T. (for "The") Chump, the mantra has cahnged: "If it's stupic, it leads." Yesterday's post by Max Boot inspired this blogger to henceforth refer to the GOP and its denizen — Wait for it — The Stupid Party and all of its followers the Stupids. No more Dumbos — with apologies to the cartoon elephant. The Stupid nominee for POTUS 45 attacked a baby for crying during one his campaign rants. The fooking lunatic belongs in a padded room with hourly injections of Thorazine. The POTUS 44 was absolutely correct to call for the Stupid party leadership to remove The Chump and send him to a padded room for an unlimited timeout. If this is (fair & balanced) moment of political reality, so be it.

[x The New Yorker]
Trump Bolsters Foreign Policy Team y Adding Carson And Palin
By Andy Borowitz

TagCrowd cloud of the following piece of writing

created at
Cartoon by Paresh Nath of The Khaleej Times

After stumbling badly on an interview question about Ukraine, the Republican Presidential nominee Donald Trump attempted on Tuesday to reassure voters about his geopolitical expertise by adding the retired neurosurgeon Ben Carson and the former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin to his team of foreign-policy advisers.

“Donald Trump always said that, as President, he would surround himself with the best people,” Trump’s spokesperson, Hope Hicks, said. “In Governor Palin and Dr. Carson, Mr. Trump now has the Dream Team.”

Speaking to reporters, Palin dismissed the controversy over Ukraine as “much ado about a gotcha question.”

“Donald Trump is one hundred and ten percent correct when he says that no one needs to be worrying about Ukraine,” she said. “If you look Ukraine up on Google Maps, like I just did, it’s right where it’s always been.”

Dr. Carson said that, as President, Donald Trump would support the territorial integrity of Ukraine and “its magnificent network of underground grain tunnels.”

“I cannot overemphasize the importance of Ukraine’s grain pipeline,” he said. “If you choke off Ukraine, Europe cannot bake bread.”

Trump’s spokesperson said that the additions to his foreign-policy brain trust should give voters “great confidence” that a Trump White House would be equal to the challenge of an international crisis. “When that 3 a.m. call comes in, and Mr. Trump is busy on Twitter, Dr. Carson and Governor Palin will be there to take the call,” she said. Ω

[Andy Borowitz is the creator the "Borowitz Report," a Web site that is a lot funnier than the stuff posted by Matt Drudge and his ilk. Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears regularly in The New Yorker. He is the first winner of the National Press Club's humor award and has won seven Dot-Comedy Awards for his web site. His most recent book (and Amazon's Best Kindle Single of the Year) is An Unexpected Twist (2012). Borowitz received a BA (English magna cum laude)from Harvard University.]

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