Sapper Answers A Student Query About Sapper Classroom Demeanor Of Late

In message 180 on Sunday, October 26, 2003 9:43pm, A Student writes:

Dear Professor Sapper,

Ive been getting an old feeling that you may be pissed off at our class or maybe just a couple of individuals. I was just wondering because youdon't come to class with the excitement you did at the beggining of the semester. Are you mad at us or just mad at the world. If you don't mind explaining please email ME back. I can't wait for the test.

Thanks.
Sincerely,
A Student

Dear Student,

First, the urological reference belongs on the streets, not in communication between a student and a college teacher. I am old school and I don't use such scatalogical language in the classroom. No references to urine. No references to bull excrement. I may utter a mild blasphemy (damn or hell) from time to time, but no scatology.

In the WebCT Glossary for this course, there is an entry for Grade 13¹. Likewise, there is an entry for Keep The Customer Satisfied².

Finally, did you read the latest posting to the WebCT Bulletin Board about the AC HIST student who pursued information from a professor of history at Yale University? That was as positive as I can be. I cannot be positive about Grade 13 behavior or the assumption that students are customers. My classroom is not McDonalds. I don't wear a paper hat and carry a spatula. There is no drive-up window in my classroom. Students are not customers.

The best statement on customers was written by the late Nobel Laureate (Literature)—William Faulkner—when he was forced to resign (or be fired) as a postal clerk in the campus post office at the University of Mississippi. Faulkner wrote:

I reckon I'll be at the beck and call of folks with money all my life,
but thank God I won't ever again have to be at the beck and call of
every son of a bitch who's got two cents to buy a stamp.

Thanks for your concern (I think).

-Dr. Sapper

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¹Grade 13 - Just as Peter Pan lived in Never-Never-Land, Dorothy and Toto lived (for a time) in the Land of Oz, and Clark Kent lived in Smallville, there are some Amarillo College students who think they are in Grade 13. This imaginary place is an extension of their experience in Grades K-12. Amarillo COLLEGE is not an extension of Happy High High School or Ridgemont High School, or Sleepy Hollow Elementary School. Students who attend Amarillo College are ADULTS. As such, they are addressed formally in Dr. Sapper's HIST classes. No nicknames, no diminutives, no jocular familiarity. Students who want a Grade 13 experience should enroll in another HIST class somewhere else, perhaps Amarillo College. There will be ZERO TOLERANCE for disruptive behavior: idle chit-chat, whistling, walking out of class before the class is dismissed are but a few examples of Grade 13 behavior that will not be tolerated in Dr. Sapper's HIST classes. A full list of disruptive, Grade 13 behaviors can be found in the WebCT Course Menu (Pet Peeves). FINAL WARNING: ZERO TOLERANCE MEANS EXACTLY THAT! (Spring 2003)

²Keep The Customers Satisfied - In 1970, Paul Simon wrote

It's the same old story Everywhere I go, I get slandered, Libeled, I hear words I never heard In the Bible. And I'm so tired,I'm oh
so tired, But I'm trying to keep my customers satisfied, Satisfied.

And Dr. Sapper was never the same, just getting more tired by the semester. (Spring 2001)