Two Views Of The Barracuda Barraquitter

It was quittin' time Way Up North on July 3^rd and Sarah The Barraquitter was true to form. The woman who attended six schools in five years or five schools in six years had little staying power in her youth. As an "adult," when The Barraquitter made her first foray into state government Way Up North, as chair of the Alaska Oil and Gas Conservation Commission, she resigned after a year in the post, protesting what she called the "lack of ethics" of fellow Republican members of the Commission. Today's blog-post is a twofer: Tom Tomorrow on the insanity of the Dumbos trying to rationalize The Barraquitter's irrationality and then the Austin Fishwrap's Faux Redneck, John Kelso, proclaims that The Barraquitter is the second coming of The Trickster. Kelso may have something. The Trickster quit as POTUS in 1974 when the kitchen got too hot and The Barraquitter could quit as POTUS in 2013 when the kitchen heats up again. Then, the "Hockey Mom" would have a hat trick in resignations from public office. If this is an ode to (fair & balanced) impermanence, so be it.

[Vannevar Bush Hyperlink — Bracketed Numbers — Directory]
[1] Tom Tomorrow Sifts The Fallout From The Barraquitter's Announcement
[2] Austin's Faux Redneck Sees The Barraquitter As The Trickster Redux

[1]—Back To Directory
[x Salon]
"This Modern World — Analysis Of The Announcement Of July 3, 2009"
By Tom Tomorrow (Dan Perkins)

Click on image to enlarge. Ω

Tom Tomorrow/Dan Perkins

[Dan Perkins is an editorial cartoonist better known by the pen name "Tom Tomorrow". His weekly comic strip, "This Modern World," which comments on current events from a strong liberal perspective, appears regularly in approximately 150 papers across the U.S., as well as on Salon and Working for Change. The strip debuted in 1990 in SF Weekly.

Perkins, a long time resident of Brooklyn, New York, currently lives in Connecticut. He received the Robert F. Kennedy Award for Excellence in Journalism in both 1998 and 2002.

When he is not working on projects related to his comic strip, Perkins writes a daily political weblog, also entitled "This Modern World," which he began in December 2001.]

Copyright © 2009 Salon Media Group, Inc.
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[2]—Back To Directory
[x Austin Fishwrap]
Palin Calls It Quits As Governor, But She's Got Plans
By John Kelso

Tag Cloud of the following article

abuse ago ain't alaska apology book cover crabbing dirty expect fit fun gov governor hike incident job joke ketchikan letterman lot maybe million months mountains neither news ok palin people perry protest quitter quitting republican rick sarah seems shows sign somebody speculation start surprised thought took truck wants weeks woman

created at TagCrowd.com

It must be time to get out the Tyrolean britches because it's hiking season for the Republican Party.

First, South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford took a hike in the mountains — with his boots off, so to speak.

Now Sarah Palin really surprised me by taking a hike from her job as governor of Alaska — in the middle of her first term. She had 18 months to go.

Palin a quitter? Who would'a thunk it. Sure, she took her share of abuse. But I thought she was the kind of gutsy woman who could make Kim Jong Il ill.

Quitting isn't something you want out of your governor. OK, so Texas Gov. Rick Perry might be the exception. But there ain't no quit in Rick Perry. He's been governor here since about 1910. 'Course, his hair has been governor since 1905.

There's been a lot of speculation about why Palin gave up her job. My theory is that she has a book deal. And she won't have time to run Alaska and write a book.

Maybe Palin is quitting her job because she's an outdoorsy gal, and she wants her own fishing show. There ain't that many women who clean up that good who can bait their own hook.

How about "Let's Go Whalin' With Sarah Palin." Or, perhaps she wants a guest appearance on "Deadliest Catch," the TV reality show about crabbing. Seems like an obvious fit, since Palin's always crabbing about somebody.

Like David Letterman. A few weeks ago, Letterman told a dirty joke about one of Palin's daughters. If you want a fresh basket of hell with a side order of slap-me-upside-the-head, make fun of somebody's child. Even I know that much.

I was at a taping of a Letterman show in New York a few weeks ago, on a day after Letterman had apologized for his joke and after Palin had accepted his apology.

Still, in a city of 8 million or so, about 50 people showed up across the street from the Ed Sullivan Theater to protest Letterman. Even worse, it was a one-sign protest. That's right. These folks were holding a protest, and they only had one lousy sign that said Letterman had gone over the line.

Now there's an indication of a down economy — the Republicans can afford only one sign.

Guess which was the only network with a news truck out there to cover the protest? Fox. If there had been 100 people out there, maybe they would have parked two news trucks on the scene.

But the incident shows one thing: Palin has a following. And let's face it — it's hard to start a real big parade if you're the grand marshal in Ketchikan.

So expect to see a lot of red lipstick and hear "golly gee" a lot for the next three years. We thought Nixon was dead. Wrong. Neither is Palin. She's just warmin' up.

Hey, at least Tina Fey's happy, right?

[Downeaster (Maine-native) John Kelso has worked for the Austin (Texas) American-Statesman as a humor columnist since 1977. Before coming to Austin, Kelso worked at several newspapers: The Manchester (NH) Union-Leader; The Boonville (MO) Daily News; The Palm Beach (FL) Post, and the Racine (WI.) Journal Times. Kelso has been a general assignment reporter, a copy editor, a sports editor, and an outdoor writer. As a pretend-redneck, Kelso is all gimme cap and no double-wide. His redneck-shtik appears thrice weekly: Sundays, Tuesdays, and Fridays in the Austin Fishwrap.]

Copyright © 2009 Austin American-Statesman

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Copyright © 2009 Sapper's (Fair & Balanced) Rants & Raves