Saturday, April 17, 2010

7 Bad Dads Portrayed By The Same Actor?

The Great Wikipedia tells us that Nicolas Cage (born Nicolas Kim Coppola; January 7, 1964) is a U.S. actor. Cage appeared as an extra in "Brubaker" in 1980 and his career (and life) since then have seen more ups and downs than a rollercoaster. Cage's most recent film is "Kick-Ass" and the jury is out. If this is (fair & balanced) risk-taking, so be it.

[x NY Magazine]
"Kick-Ass" And Nicolas Cage’s Crappiest Onscreen Fathering
By Lane Brown

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In this week's "Kick-Ass," Nicolas Cage plays Damon Macready, a former cop who trains his foul-mouthed [purple bewigged] 11-year-old daughter — actress Chloe Moretz — in combat and enlists her in a plot to settle a score with a mob boss ("Is what’s onscreen a form of child abuse?" wonders New York's David Edelstein in his review). Watching it, it occurred to us that — outside of World Trade Center, maybe — we don't think we've seen Cage play one non-terrible dad in any of his 60-plus films. After the jump, we recall some of his finest movie-fathering moments.

"Raising Arizona" (1987)

Presumably to save money for college, Cage, an ex-con, steals diapers from the supermarket for the baby he has kidnapped.

"The Family Man" (2000)

When Cage, a rich Wall Street arbitrageur, wakes up in an alternate universe in which he married his college girlfriend and had a family, he flees immediately back to his office in the city, leaving his wife to deal with their kids on Christmas morning. But somehow all is made well when he later changes a poopy diaper.

"Matchstick Men" (2003)

Cage, a grifter, teaches his 14-year old daughter (Alison Lohman) to trick a lonely woman into believing she's won the lottery and split half the expected prize.

"The Weather Man" (2005)

After noticing a pack of cigarettes in his 12-year-old daughter's bag and saying nothing (kids need to fight some battles themselves), he makes her finish a three-legged ice-skating race even after she falls and tears her ACL. "There's a lesson here ... I'm proud of you," he says, dragging her across the finish line while she moans in pain.

"Knowing" (2009)

Cage, an alcoholic widower, knows that his 10-year-old son always preferred his dead mother to him. So when Armageddon approaches, he selflessly sends the boy to live on another planet with terrifying aliens.

"Kick-Ass" (2010)

In an early scene, Cage cures his 11-year-old daughter's fear of being shot forever — by shooting her twice. (She's wearing a Kevlar vest — plus, he takes her for for ice cream afterward.) Ω

[Lane Brown writes for the online version of New York Magazine (]

Copyright © 2010 New York Magazine

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Copyright © 2010 Sapper's (Fair & Balanced) Rants & Raves

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