Friday, January 10, 2014

Today: The Get Out Of Jail (Forever) Card

JPMorgan Chase is the marvel of the age. Commit crime of infinite magnitude and skip on down the road. Willie Sutton, this nation's most notorious bank robber between the late 1920s-1952 — 100 banks, was asked, "Why do you rob banks, Willie?" And Sutton replied: "Because that's where the money is." Now, Willie Sutton has been reborn in Jamie Dimon and the Merry Men of JPMorgan Chase. What a combination: $2.509B in total assets and the morals of Willie Sutton. If this is (fair & balanced) unpunished larceny, so be it.

[x The Nation]
By The Deadline Poet (Calvin Trillin)

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JPMorgan Nears Deal in Case Tied to Madoff
The New York Times

They’ve got endless money. If that’s all it takes,
They must be relieved at this point:
They’ve spent many billions in settlements now,
But nary a day in the joint. Ω

[Calvin Trillin began his career as a writer for Time magazine. Since July 2, 1990, as a columnist at The Nation, Trillin has written his weekly "Deadline Poet" column: humorous poems about current events. Trillin has written considerably more pieces for The Nation than any other single person. A native of Kansas City, MO, Trillin received his BA from Yale College in 1957. He served in the army, and then joined Time.]

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